Storm Chasing And Relationships

[Bridget Beddow]

stormy relationships

Hello, Everybody. I absolutely agree with each and everyone about having an understanding partner. Me and my ex-fiancee split up a couple of years ago due to some other misunderstanding, but I absolutely have no doubt that if we were together and I told him I wanted to pick up storm chasing, he would have called me stupid and talk about how stupid of an idea it was. I will always have a problem, though, because I've always been told how much I don't act like a girl, so I guess I shouldn't let it bother me but kinda makes you wonder where to find someone who's understanding and can deal with my "not much of a woman" flaw - hehe!! Those of you who have an understanding partner who loves you for it, Treasure them forever, you are so blessed!

 

[Shyanna Busch]

Re: stormy relationships

Originally posted by Bridget Beddow
but kinda makes you wonder where to find someone who's understanding and can deal with my \"not much of a woman\" flaw - hehe!! Those of you who have an understanding partner who loves you for it, Treasure them forever, you are so blessed!

I'm going to respond to this under a new thread in Everything Else.

 

[mrobinson]

Originally posted by Melissa Moon+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Melissa Moon)</div>

<!--QuoteBegin-fplowman

Hey Melissa I'll chase with ya... 8)

Sorry, but I'm already booked to go chasing with William Hung :wink:[/b]

Damn girl you owe me a keyboard!!!

Ahahahahahahahahahahahaha :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[mrobinson]

I guess I am weird in the respect that as much as I have in common with other chasers I won't date one. I gave up chasing for many years because of a relationship and I will never do that again though. Chasing comes first, its my passion and very much a part of who I am. Any man who cannot handle that cannot handle me and I am outta there.

One thing I have found kinda cool is that most guys I tell that I chase think its cool.... guess we will have to see what they think when I go out chasing next year for weeks at a time like I did this year with male chase partners LOL.

Time will tell....

 

[Susan Strom]

Bridget wrote:

if we were together and I told him I wanted to pick up storm chasing, he would have called me stupid and talk about how stupid of an idea it was. I will always have a problem, though, because I've always been told how much I don't act like a girl, so I guess I shouldn't let it bother me but kinda makes you wonder where to find someone who's understanding and can deal with my \"not much of a woman\" flaw

Dear Bridget,
You do not have a "not much of a woman" flaw. What you had, it sounds like, was a partner who made a decision to criticize your hobby, reaching for words like "stupid", perhaps out of jealousy, maybe lack of understanding (of your zeal for chasing), or other reasons only he could know. Many people have been in relationships like this, and often, they are simply non fun. When a partner brings to the table some fulfillment in his own life through his own hobbies, you'd probably find a better relationship. I can tell you one thing for sure though...you were acting like a girl. The entire time. Surprise...

 

[Jay McCoy]

My current chase partner is female and she is as crazy about wx as I am. I couldnt imagine chasing without her. We have grown very close over the past year and a half. My ex-wife could never understand the love I have for storms and would always complain about me being gone in the evenings (even though she was always at her parents house and not home anyway). I could never be in a relationship again where they either didnt understand my passion deal with me being gone or loving it as much and going with me. I dont know where this relationship with Kanani and myself will go but I am enjoying the way its working and have enjoyed chasing more the past 2 seasons than I ever have. I even trust her enough to drive my truck while I navigate, look at radar, and shoot video and anybody who knows me knows NOBODY drives my truck!! She is now as an important part of my life as chasing itself.

 

[Gayla Drummond]

Originally posted by Jay McCoy
My current chase partner is female and she is as crazy about wx as I am.

She's pretty, too. It was nice seeing you again, Jay.

Chasing and relationships....*sigh*

Mine and David's 3rd date was my first chase, and I probably have a bit of a unique view of the whole chasing/relationship matter, being as how I've both chased, and sat at home while he chased.

I was hooked, but I freely admit I've never been as hooked as David is. I love chasing, but for me, 50% of the enjoyment of it has always been that it's something we went and did together. When it came to the 2003 season, I wasn't able to go, because we didn't have reliable childcare for our daughter.

That caused some problems...I encouraged him to go, but at the same time, I resented him going...probably going to shock him here, :lol: , but I hated that I couldn't go on so much as one chase with him that year. At that time, I felt as though chasing was an 'us' thing, and there I was, being left out of the 'us' where it was concerned. He'd come home, all eager to show me the video he'd gotten, to talk about what he'd seen, who he'd met up with on the road, and I'd just sort of 'yeah, uh huh' at him until he stopped, normally pretty hurt and pissed off by my reaction, or lack thereof. It got to the point that I felt as though chasing came before me with him, when after much time spent talking and thinking about it, I realized it didn't...it was more a part of him than something separate.

That may answer the question about why more women aren't involved in chasing....children. It's still very much the woman's job to take care of the kiddos...not to say men just throw parental responsibilities and family obligations out the window during chase season, by any means (so no one whack me! :shock: ), but there you go. Who takes care of the kiddos at your house during chase season?

But, there is another problem with chasing...the financial aspect of it. When you're trying to raise a family, and pay the bills, and one partner is obsessed with chasing, you get to where you resent the money spent on chasing, because there's always so much needing to be done that's not chase related. It's not that big of a problem when both partners are able to chase each time, or most of the time...then it's like a vacation from the mundane reality of life (paying the bills, cleaning house, etc). That's sort of selfish, but then, people are selfish, aren't we?

Having said all that, let me redeem myself a little. :lol:
I've always supported David's desire to chase. I've helped him purchase equipment, heck, the Windstar was my MomMobile, and I handed it over when his Explorer went kaput, just so he'd have a good chase vehicle (well, we would have one, I chased that year!). Even when I was hating the fact I couldn't go, I was making sure we had enough money in our budget for him to go out chasing. When he's been down about something, and threatened to quit chasing, I've talked him out of it (not like that was HARD, or anything, :wink: I think he just wanted to see what I had to say!).

On the flip side, though, you could say that chasing related items helped make our decision to divorce. But, neither chasing nor anything else could ever come between our friendship with one another.

And, chasing is somewhat responsible for the problems we were having now being resolved, so you can't beat that with a stick. :lol:

Like I said, having been on both sides of the fence, maybe I have a somewhat unique perspective on it all. *shrug* All I know is, it's been like coming home this past week, getting to get out with David to do some chasing!

 

[Susan Strom]

Gayla wrote:

more women aren't involved in chasing....children

That's a good point. I don't have kiddos, & I pay for my own bills so I guess I do admittedly have a lot more mobility that way. But I work FT so that's my limiting factor for chasing I guess. Fortunately, my chasing occurs at night which works out perfectly and I can make an annual run to the Plains for vacation.

Aside from that, if I did have kiddos I know how they would be raised. They would grow up as I did, where being in the outdoors, studying the weather and the natural world, hiking and being in Nature is a major aspect of the family.

When I was a little girlie my dad would take us up to a ranger station at about 10,000 ft in the Sierra Nevada to look at the mountains. No surprise that some of his pictures were of Sierra lightning bolts To this day I remember how loud was the thunder up there and how fascinating. His lightning and Earth science books were the first ones I grabbed for as soon as I could read. My dad is a weather geek too and actually just this Father's Day I gave him a new weather radio My mom is a Nature freak as well and usually she was the one who learned about the cool stuff to do and see when I was a kid.

Little ninos would not stop me from photographing severe weather, I'm just way too into it, but I could see how there would be limitations if one is to embrace parenthood. I'm sure one of those for me would be the wee hours I stay out (4am lastnight, photographing the Mazatzal fireline again). But kiddos would be along for any (appropriate) adventure, I'd want to expose a child to much in the natural world for his own benefit (that, and music when young...equally important IMHO)

Good thing they make special backpacks to take kiddos along on hikes I have some (American) friends who live in Nepal, their Himalaya treks are done with the little one on their back.

 

[Jay McCoy]

Originally posted by GaylaDrummond+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(GaylaDrummond)</div>

<!--QuoteBegin-Jay McCoy

My current chase partner is female and she is as crazy about wx as I am.

She's pretty, too. It was nice seeing you again, Jay.[/b]

It was good to see you and David chasing together. I was starting to wonder about all the hours David and Graham were spending in the van together :lol:

just kidding guys :wink:

 

[Gayla Drummond]

Originally posted by Jay McCoy+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Jay McCoy)</div>

Originally posted by GaylaDrummond@
<!--QuoteBegin-Jay McCoy

My current chase partner is female and she is as crazy about wx as I am.

She's pretty, too. It was nice seeing you again, Jay.

It was good to see you and David chasing together. I was starting to wonder about all the hours David and Graham were spending in the van together :lol:

just kidding guys :wink:[/b]

From what I understand, Graham was starting to get a little nervous....shhhhh. :wink: :lol:

 

[Gayla Drummond]

Originally posted by Susan Strom
Gayla wrote:

more women aren't involved in chasing....children

That's a good point. I don't have kiddos, & I pay for my own bills so I guess I do admittedly have a lot more mobility that way. But I work FT so that's my limiting factor for chasing I guess.

And that's where you're lucky...you do something that allows you to pay the bills & chase too. I think that a lot of women, if it's not because of children, just don't have the jobs that allow them to pay the bills and do much in the way of chasing (I would say mostly younger women, 18-25), or if they do earn enough, they more than likely can't afford the time away from work to chase.

Has anyone every done a poll on the average age of women chasers? I'd be interested in the results. Not only their age, but if they're married, if they chase alone, if they have kiddos....might just gather some facts to back up this particular point.

 

[Melissa Moon]

Originally posted by GaylaDrummond


And that's where you're lucky...you do something that allows you to pay the bills & chase too. I think that a lot of women, if it's not because of children, just don't have the jobs that allow them to pay the bills and do much in the way of chasing (I would say mostly younger women, 18-25), or if they do earn enough, they more than likely can't afford the time away from work to chase.

I can say that I somewhat agree with this, but I'm going to add a little bit. I think that it is true a lot of times that women do work jobs that can inhibit chasing, but don't think that it is a helpless situation for women brought on due to equality issues; rather, I think it is a matter of choice and/or disbelief in oneself.

In today's society, I really do believe that there are equal opportunities for the same jobs for both men and women. So, if a woman wants a job that will allow her time off to chase, I do not think that she will have trouble finding one. I mean, I know male chasers who work in fast food and grocery stores and stuff like that who are able to come out to chase each Spring. I also see just as many women working those jobs, so there is no reason that a woman "cannot" find a job that allows her time to chase due to gender. Of course, other things come into factor of that equation (such as kids and all of that jazz).

I would fall under the 18-25 category. My big constraint on chasing would be wanting to do well in school so that maybe someday maybe my paycheck would involve doing what I love for the scientific community. I think that if I were not going to college and getting a met. degree, I would be working backbreaking hours on whatever job I could get and then saving up whatever is left over for a few weeks of chasing each year.

This might start a new brewhaha on this thread, so I apologize in advance if it does, but I also think that one of the main reasons some females don't chase as much as guys is because they are dependent on their male chaser of choice to take them out.

 

[Gayla Drummond]

Originally posted by Melissa Moon
I can say that I somewhat agree with this, but I'm going to add a little bit. I think that it is true a lot of times that women do work jobs that can inhibit chasing, but don't think that it is a helpless situation for women brought on due to equality issues; rather, I think it is a matter of choice and/or disbelief in oneself.
*snip*
This might start a new brewhaha on this thread, so I apologize in advance if it does, but I also think that one of the main reasons some females don't chase as much as guys is because they are dependent on their male chaser of choice to take them out.

It's very true that women do have the opportunities to take jobs that pay highly, and there are some young women like you who will work towards a career that will relate to chasing because of their interest/passion/whatever for it.

That shouldn't cause a big stink, about female chasers being dependent on their male counterparts to take them chasing. I would think that it's just a fact for some of us.

I prefer to chase with David rather than alone, for the following reasons: He introduced me to chasing, and has taught me everything I have learned about it, and he has 19 years' worth of experience to my three.

I have chased alone...not much, and never went on a very long/high mileage chase alone....mainly because A) I just don't like chasing by myself, and B) know I don't have that much experience, thus am more likely to make a bad decision chasing alone.

So, in a sense, I am dependent upon him where chasing's concerned, and don't have a problem admitting it. :lol:

 

[mrobinson]

Originally posted by Melissa Moon+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Melissa Moon)</div>

<!--QuoteBegin-GaylaDrummond

And that's where you're lucky...you do something that allows you to pay the bills & chase too. I think that a lot of women, if it's not because of children, just don't have the jobs that allow them to pay the bills and do much in the way of chasing (I would say mostly younger women, 18-25), or if they do earn enough, they more than likely can't afford the time away from work to chase.

I can say that I somewhat agree with this, but I'm going to add a little bit. I think that it is true a lot of times that women do work jobs that can inhibit chasing, but don't think that it is a helpless situation for women brought on due to equality issues; rather, I think it is a matter of choice and/or disbelief in oneself.

In today's society, I really do believe that there are equal opportunities for the same jobs for both men and women. So, if a woman wants a job that will allow her time off to chase, I do not think that she will have trouble finding one. I mean, I know male chasers who work in fast food and grocery stores and stuff like that who are able to come out to chase each Spring. I also see just as many women working those jobs, so there is no reason that a woman "cannot" find a job that allows her time to chase due to gender. Of course, other things come into factor of that equation (such as kids and all of that jazz).

I would fall under the 18-25 category. My big constraint on chasing would be wanting to do well in school so that maybe someday maybe my paycheck would involve doing what I love for the scientific community. I think that if I were not going to college and getting a met. degree, I would be working backbreaking hours on whatever job I could get and then saving up whatever is left over for a few weeks of chasing each year.

This might start a new brewhaha on this thread, so I apologize in advance if it does, but I also think that one of the main reasons some females don't chase as much as guys is because they are dependent on their male chaser of choice to take them out.[/b]

Being a little older than you and a single mom I would have to agree and disagree with you. Its a choice you make and how serious you are about it to make it work. I have 2 little boys but I still managed to chase quite a bit this year. If you really want to do something you can make it happen regardless. It was harder for me to get out this year in May than it was in June because of the kids school and yet I still managed to get out on the 19th, 22nd, 24th and 29th.

Your last statement kinda bugs me a bit but I sorta kinda agree with you. I don't think that is true of every female chaser but I do think it is for some female chasers. Personally I have no problems chasing alone or with a partner. Just because 90% of chasers are guys does not mean I am dependent on them to take me out chasing cause that is not the case at all. I don't think that is the case with you Melissa or a few other female chasers out there. I think its a fine line but really attitudes like that make it harder for women chasers out there who are serious because it just makes people believe without the guy/chase partner they would be no where. This is a attitude that PISSES ME OFF specifically when I see women out there who would never ever ever attempt to chase alone and sleep with every chase partner they have... Its one of the reasons I have a strict rule about not dating chasers and thats really really sad it has to be like that. I think I would kill for a female chase partner just to shut people up who think because I am a woman the GUY got me a tor.. What really pisses me off is when I hear the guys make comments about well known female chasers and attribute the tornadoes they have seen to their male nowcaster... Its BULLSHIT

 

[Susan Strom]

M/F not an issue

I absolutely think a woman can craft her life into anything she wants. Chase alone, or with a partner. Kids, no kids. A woman can roll up her sleeves, get dirty, and do anything she wants career-wise. It's all about choices we make and priorities that we select to take importance in life, just like it is for men. Is achievement or success easy? No way. Do people trip up along the way? Of course. Are people responsible for their own happiness? I wouldn't want it any other way, would you?

I view the male/female issue as irrelevant to chasing. I built my chasing alone, going on 8 years. It was me who was deeply affected by the 'close encounter' that got me into all this, so developed a passion for it, therefore it is I who is responsible to own it - do the study, learn, invest the time and money, drive the miles, take the risks. If I had a love interest who was a stormchaser, he would have his own personal chase passions & goals as well anyway.

I agree that the learning of anything can involve consulting with experts, learning from those who know more, such as Gayla learning from David when she was new to chasing. However, she took it upon herself to absorb the knowledge he was offering and apply it in the field. Marriage is really not an issue here though, it sounds like it was Gayla who sought the knowledge and nurtured her passion for chasing on an individual level where she found meaning. David might be her coach, but has many goals and passions of his own to cultivate.

I too have sought out mentors, we all do, it's part of learning for everyone. For instance, I look to desert guides and rangers (one in particular) to assist me in gaining knowledge of desert and wilderness. I sought out and found who I think is the best desert guide in the world, a Native Arizonan who knows the desert intimately. My job then is to listen to everything he says about plants, history, landscape so I can build upon my knowledge. Having a mentor however is very different than being "dependent ". The learning and applying is up to me. My desert guide is not a boyfriend anyway, but I don't think romance is relevant to the full responsibility of learning that lies inside the individual. The teaching of desert ways is available, but the learning and the showing up is up to ME, even when it's hot, there are snakes or I don't feel like it. The knowledge of stormchasing is available, but the ongoing learning is up to each person individually to do and achieve, male and female equally.

Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness whatever that may be is for everyone, M/F, there is no gender issue in the pursuit of a personal passion. It is up to each individual to realize their strengths and accept full accountability for achievement of their personal goals (like Melissa going to college, or Gayla learning Web design). Male/female not a factor. Priorities and the arrangement of one's life is the only factor.

"You can't make someone else's choices. You shouldn't let someone else make yours". - from Colin Powell's rules.