I am going to disagree with the statement "it is not the fault of the home design or materials itself". It is very MUCH the fault of these 2 factors! Now, I realize that there is not much the will stand up to an EF5 but the fact is that ALL building construction has gotten skimpier over the years. A 2x4 is now 1 3/8" x 3 1/4". Sheet rock has replaced other types of interiors (for the fire protection rating, which I am thankful for!) but it provides NO protection for anything else. If you look at the photo's from Joplin you will notice that there are very few brick veneer or stone houses but those that were there faired better than the all wood construction. Of the wood construction, those that had ALL wood, including shiplap interior walls and ceilings faired better than those with sheetrock interiors. The words "faired better" meaning that there was more of the structure still visible. It is going to be interesting to read the report from the NWS and foresenic engineers when it becomes available.
I'm going to disagree with your disagreement. I am a structural engineer so I can speak relatively intelligently about most of your points. First off, a 2x4 is 1.5"x3.5", and has been that way since the early 1960's. Brick veneer will help stop debris, but structurally it is no stronger than the wall supporting it...meaning it has no out of plane strength. If the wind pressure is enough to blow down the stud wall, it will blow down the stud wall with brick on the face as well. It's also a common misconception that just because a house is built of stone, masonry, or multi-wythe brick that it is stronger than a wood framed house. A 6" masonry wall has less bending strength than a 2x6 exterior wall. Yes, it stops debris better, but that isn't going to do you much good when the wall has collapsed on top of you. Also, believe it or not, construction methods today are much better than what they were in the past, mainly because there was no governing code or code of standard practice for residential construction. I have done many residential inspections and I can confidently say that wooden homes today are constructed better and with tighter tolerances than homes built in, say, the early '40's. They still aren't great, but they are better.
Also, drywall, shiplap interiors, lath and plaster, or any other type of interior finish serves absolutely no structural purpose whatsoever (other than lateral bracing of studs), and in any tornado of any reasonable strength will make no difference in the structural performance of your home. None. I can take a piece of debris and drive it through drywall at 90 mph as easily as I can on any other interior finish.
The simple fact is this: no reasonably built home is going to withstand the impact of an EF5 tornado. Even an EF4 or EF3 most likely. Many deaths this year can be attributed to the simple fact that the strongest ones hit populated areas, and that there was a lack of basements, which are often times impossible to build in many locations in tornado alley. High water tables (southeast), shallow bedrock (areas of Missouri and Arkansas), and expansive clay soils (Texas) contribute to this. To be honest, I am actually amazed watching the videos of those tornadoes that more people weren't killed.
Can homes be constructed better? Sure they can. Hell, sometimes going through the International Residential Code I'm shocked at what is allowed structurally. But designing a home to properly withstand 130 mph winds is insanely expensive. Trust me on that, I've done commercial designs in hurricane areas in Florida. Besides, if you get any debris flying into the house the only thing that will save you is a solidly grouted masonry wall or a home with concrete exterior walls. It's just not practical, and to say that going back to shiplap siding and brick veneer will protect us better is a fallacy.