Storms and Dating: Can the Two Mix?

[Jeff Snyder]

My wife knew of my love of chasing when we first started dating, so there were no surprises. She understands the hobby (which is, occasionally, an obsession), so she expects me to make some quick schedule changes to get out of planned dates/outtings, etc. Of course, this works both ways -- if she's flexible to my schedule, I need to be flexible when I'm not chasing. We dated for about 6 years before we got married, and she's chased with my a couple of dozen times through the years. Unfortunately, many of those were during some pretty bad years (2002 and 2005, namely), so she's also very, very aware of busts. This also means that she is well aware of the inaccuracies and unknowns of meteorology as it pertains to severe storms and tornadoes.

I just say that you go about your business as usual. If she doesn't understand, then she may never understand, and you don't want to spend a chunk of your life in that kind of relationship. However, this also means that you have to spend the effort to make sure your significant other gets the attention he/she deserves when you are not chasing. My wife has never really complained about the costs or time, and I'd like to think that it's because I try particularly hard to make sure she doesn't feel like she's 2nd rate to my hobby. Of course, if I'm out there spending a lot of time and money chasing, there's a point at which I'll start to feel guilty leaving her home alone a lot. This is my self-limiter -- I try to limit myself to no more than a few days out each time (i.e. no multiple trips longer than 2-3 days in a row), not necessarily because I don't want her to feel slighted, but because I actually do want to spend time with her. Just my 2 cents worth of experience...
Just my 2 cents worth of experience...

 

[mike scantlin]

Just my 2 cents worth of experience...
Just my 2 cents worth of experience...

Thats 4 cents, Jeff. Now your opinion is worth more than any other "just my 2 cents" comments. Nice.

 

[JIM SELLARS]

I couldn't get girls to go out with me storm or not...Hee Hee...One thing that I have found is that being on a "DATE" and the adrenaline/testosterone effect of chasing don't mix well...Several years ago I took my Ex-wife out on a "CHASE"...That may be a contributing factor why she's my EX....Cheers

 

[Doug Lee]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeff Snyder
Just my 2 cents worth of experience...
Just my 2 cents worth of experience...


Thats 4 cents, Jeff. Now your opinion is worth more than any other "just my 2 cents" comments. Nice.

Haven't you ever heard of inflation?

I won't comment on the chasing and dating thing. I can't even afford a date now. Most of the money I make nowdays goes into savings so I can buy a working vehicle.

 

[Michael Carlson]

I had this happen last year. I was supposed to go out with this girl to the movies but decided to go chasing instead. She knew I chase storms and wasn't happy at first but came to terms with it. Anyone who knows me knows all I do is chase! That reminds me I still need to make that up to her WOOPS haha.

 

[Tony Laubach]

My lady and I are going on 4 years as of two weeks from now, and she's more than put up with my whims. A good example of this was me calling her at 6pm Wednesday asking her to give me a ride to the airport at 9pm that night so I could catch a midnight flight to Georgia and chase in Alabama/Mississippi yesterday. Talk about extreme!

How or why she puts up with it is beyond me. Obviously its who I am and is part of the package, but she can leave whenever. She's an amazing woman who puts up with a lot. With that said, it is possible to maintain a good relationship while chasing. You just have to get very very lucky like me!

 

[Shane Adams]

Fortunately for me personally, I've reached a point in life where a significant other would merely be the icing on the cake of a life I've worked hard the past 12 years to create for myself. There was never a woman included in my blueprint when I set out in 1996 to make chasing tornadoes my life, but when I was younger I still had the yearnings for that companionship. Now that I'm older, and have developed into a semi-solid chaser, I find the challenge of keeping myself moving forward, and becoming a more-skilled storm chaser, is all the happiness and satisfaction I could want. I don't deny the company of a woman is one of life's most precious gifts, but it will always be a distant second to an early morning stepping outside, breathing in Gulf air, and smiling as I wonder what future the road ahead later that day will lead me to.

 

[Michael O'Keeffe]

It has never really been an issue with me. I've have a few girlfriends since I started chasing and it has never interfered. They are usually always interested in my chasing and ask me questions and stuff. If a chase comes up they always understand, then again I'm in high school.

 

[Susan Strom]

LOL Susan......this forum's FULL of men!! How can you say that doesn't mix?

It is the kind of chasing that I do, I am on the road all night for monsoon, chasing lightning in some of the most remote backcountry of Arizona, New Mexico and Colorado Plateau, with some Plains time too. Chases easily go until dawn, and I often end up several hundred miles from home or in another state, where it is an hour until the next town. Realistically, most men aren't down for that lifestyle in a girlfriend, but that's perfectly okay and understandable, I am very happy in my life and am not really looking.

 

[Andrew Pritchard]

I've dated a couple girls who got somewhat annoyed when I'd tell them that I was going to be gone for the day chasing. But, I've since found the most understanding girl ever about my passion.

We're going on our 3rd chase season together now. At first I told her over and over that I was sorry that I was ditching her for so much time, often days or weeks at a time just to chase the wind mostly because I was used to the way other girls behaved about the hobby. For once, she was the one saying things like "storms only come a handful of days out of the year, and we can spend any of the other days together" and that I should enjoy chase season while it's here. She's told me that storms were in my life before she was, so she knew what she had to compete with. She even sits and watches chase videos with me now that I'm going through SDS phases.

So, women and chasing can go hand in hand. You just have to weed through to find the understanding woman.

On the wedding/anniversary note... we aren't seriously talking about marriage right now, but she's expressed wanting to have a May wedding. I said it wouldn't work out but she told me I could just take her with if a chase day fell on our anniversary. I'd almost feel bad taking advantage of her unheard of understanding nature.

 

[Gerrit Gulden]

I could actually see myself leaving a family party for a chase opportunity as well as a girlfriend. The few ladies I have met out here in Idaho liked the idea of me shooting lightning photography but didnt quite understand the intensity of my passion. One experience I had was I went on a movie date (dinner was first) and after the movie we exited the theater and to the NorthEast there was lightning. It was like someone punched me in the stomach, all of a sudden I was in storm mode yet trapped cause I wanted to continue my date yet the chances of new lightning photographs was fading away. It was a tough situation and I know she noticed it. But what was I too do?

I would love to have a girlfriend but my passion at the moment keeps my concentration on the weather. If I settled down with any girl she would have to literally be like Susan Strom or Be Susan Strom. Seriously I envy those of you that have your girlfriend as your chase partner or have a girlfriend that would drop all plans due to the weather. Must be nice. =)

For now I will be happily single when I am chasing and lonely when the weather doesnt cooperate.

-gerrit

 

[Dan Melby]

I am one of the few that seem to have lucked out with a girl that is very interested in chasing. Actually, it is one of the reasons that she was interested in me. She is very understanding when I tell her that we can never make any solid plans April through July. And all plans are tentative from July to October. Before this season she had never seen hail or tornadoes, and this past season I was able to show her both. The first hail she ever saw was baseball! She is already gearing up for next season and actually bought a new GPS!! Now, if I could only get her to go over the hours of data while I drink beer and watch ESPN!! haha

 

[Bob Hartig]

It is the kind of chasing that I do, I am on the road all night for monsoon, chasing lightning in some of the most remote backcountry of Arizona, New Mexico and Colorado Plateau, with some Plains time too. Chases easily go until dawn, and I often end up several hundred miles from home or in another state, where it is an hour until the next town. Realistically, most men aren't down for that lifestyle in a girlfriend, but that's perfectly okay and understandable, I am very happy in my life and am not really looking.

Susan, it's refreshing to hear from a woman who "gets it." I'm sure there are more like you out there. But I don't think it's really a gender issue at all. Male or female, storm chasers are simply a different breed. That's not to sound elitist; it's just recognizing the reality of human uniqueness. Ideally, I'd love to find someone with whom I can actually share my love of severe weather. But I don't think that ideal is required in order for two people to be compatible. What I do think is necessary is a mutual celebration and supportiveness of each other's giftedness and passions, along with a willingness to make sacrifices where necessary on behalf of the other person. Too many sacrifices suggest that the personalities involved don't fit; yet an unwillingness to make reasonable sacrifices indicates selfishness and immaturity. Somewhere in the middle, I have to believe there's a synergy. A number of comments on this thread have affirmed that there is, and I'm glad--because while I'm too old to "settle," I'm too young to stop hoping.

 

[Dustin Wilcox]

Chicks often find it quite interesting, we used to throw some pretty wild parties at my place, and a couple of times after I had a few too many I would bust out some storm footage, much to my surprise video of a good tornado can really impress the ladies. As for the original ? if I were on a date and a "decent" setup was occurring, much like David said, I would be aware of the threat long before the date began so there would be plenty of time to make arrangements, however, if to my surprise some crazy renegade storm got going while on the date, considering we're getting along I would have to stick with the lady, a good woman is about as hard to catch as a good tornado, trust me I've spent plenty of time and money chasing both. Now if we had been together for along time i.e. she was my GF/Wife I'd be gone after first sight of a tower.

 

[David Draun]

I'm dating a girl who loves storms just as much as I do. Yeah she's quite amazing. I have invited her to go with me on my chase trip this Spring if someone else cancels, and she has expressed great interest in going!