Yeah David, that was a tough time man. Glad you are alright. Your experience kind of saved you, but it also kind of got you in trouble. I agree the man upstairs probably was looking out for you - likely cause you asked for help.
I personally know that chasing at night can be terrifying. I typically often chase alone, and have been in so many bad situations at night it's hard to remember them all. I just know that I have kind of a built in phobia now when certain situations start coming together like a second sense knowing that stuff is starting to get bad and start looking for alternatives. I can't say that I've been quite as close to disaster as you in this case but I haven't been all that much further away either in a few instances.
Night can be terrifying because of the unknown. We just can't always see what is out there. We may think we can, or we may think we understand what is going on, but then we may also think - yeah, but what if. In your case...what if it turns right, - which it did. Threatnet and radar are ok for daytime, but at night they aren't pin point enough detail wise, or time wise for us to know exactly what we are dealing with. As you just learned, all it took was for a bad break or so (the mud road), and the assumption you could make it. Of course at night things appear further away than they really are I have heard.
Anyway, I'm just saying all this, because this is stuff I have done. I've thought I was ok, but then it gets crazy, things change quickly, there is no time for a decision. What is the right decision? In your case you were at the east road option (15) was it right to go east, or go north, slowly proceed to the turn at 15 or do a 180 away from the intersection and head back south into all precip and big hail you mentioned. As you found out, (and I'm sure you've experiened before) sometimes you just don't have much of an idea of what the right thing to do is. At some point you just have to pick and hope. That is a terrible feeling and I've been there many times. All I can say is when we chase close, - particularly at night we will get scared at times (or worse). I've had experiences where I didn't even intend to chase close at night - from a day chase trip and just got pinned. It's good to remember that wherever the high speed wind is headed is likely the direction of the tornado. Your head for the core tactic was also likely a good choice except for the fact that you potentially cross in front of, in, or right behind the tornado as it passes. Also we have to remember that supercells and tornadoes are dynamic and there are no guarantees. There is no guarantee that it will remain on the same course, there is no guarantee that Threatnet presents an accurate picture, there is no guarantee that the storm won't change and merge with other cells that we are unaware of, or perhaps merge into an HP tornado near / in the core (where we just ran for safety) or that the whole tornadic area we are in won't become a two mile wide tornado enveloping us. Scary yes! Have I been scared? Yes, many times at night. Probably not quite as bad as you here, but not that far. I've definitely been in panic mode a few times and that is not good.
I'm certainly not going to criticise you. Chasing tornadoes can be serious stuff, and everyone needs to be aware of what they are dealing with. I guess I am just sharing the fear with you man.
I know there are a lot of other chasers that have some nightmare night chase stories for you too, but I admit - yours is one of the worst short of actually taking a trip to Oz. I think it's particularly scary because from my experience I really have the imagery to imagine it happening to me.
As for you quitting chasing...I doubt it. The fear often fades in the light of day, but will reawaken in a similar situation. Chasers like you and me don't usually just walk away, - chasing gets in the blood and becomes part of who we are. It is always difficult to deny ourselves, but of course we can if we try hard enough on principle or revelation.