Crappiest, sorriest excuses for thunderstorms on the planet.

David Draun

David Draun

EF5
Joined
Mar 3, 2004
Messages
1,143
Location
Mt Prospect, IL
Although they are becoming more frequent as winter approaches, these thunderstorms in Baghdad barely qualify as such. It really looked like it was going to do something good today. There were towering cumulus, albeit elevated, and high humidities. As today's shower passed, it was a "burst" of moderate rainfall mixed with faint rumbles of thunder. Maybe the term "thundershower" should not be such a faux pas to describe these poor excuses for convection. :cry:
 
Can you send some of those "thundershowers" to north Texas? My last convective event was quite a long time ago. I was gettin' all excited about virga yesterday.
 
Um, yea, I would if I could. Hey, I need you and Dave Brookshier to put out a UPC forecast for this area. Could you guys do that, please? :)
 
David's working on this one. The forecast for your area will be up in the next day. I'm going chem-trail chasing, as that is the only form of cloud out right now. Who would have thought jet exhaust could be so fun?
 
The Latest From The Unprediction Center

FROM YOUR LOCAL UPC FORECAST OFFICE LOCATED SOMEWHERE WE BRING YOU THE LATEST.

THE LATEST
EXTREME RISK EVENT FOR BAGDAD! :!: (BLACK BUBBLE)
ISSUED>TODAY
VALID> YES IT IS
WHEN>TOMMOROW 12-24-05 OR SOMETHING

USING OUR HIGHLY ADVANCED TECHED OUT WEATHER EQUIPMENT WE HAVE DETECTED AN AREA OF INTENSE ACTIVITY DEVELOPING OVER IRAQ. WE KNEW THE EXACT LOCATION BUT SOMEONE LOST IT, ER AHM WHO CARES THE EXTREME RISK AREA NOW ENGULFS ALL OF THE MIDDLE EAST. MULTIPLE HORIZONTAL VORTICIES HAVE BEEN CREATED AS A RESULT OF FREQUENT MILITARY AIRCRAFT FLIGHTS. THESE VORTICIES WILL CONVERGE TO FORM ONE DOMINANT JET STREAM WHICH WILL THEN LIKE BRING ABOUT REDICULOUS AMOUNTS OF MOISTURE RETURN TO THE WATCH AREA. AS THIS OCCURS WEATHER DEFLECTED FROM THE CENTRAL U.S. WILL CONVERGE OVER IRAQ CAUSING EXTREME INSTABILITY ALOFT WITH CAPES REACHING 976,823 JKG. WE KNOW THIS IS ACCURATE OUR FORECASTS ARE NEVER WRONG. MONSTROUS MASSIVE TORNADO TUBES AND HAIL TO THE SIZE OF MOBILE HOMES WILL BECOME THE PRIMARY WEATHER THREAT. ANY WEAKER THUNDER SHOWERS WILL INSTANTLY EXPLODE AS THEY WILL BE UNABLE TO HANDLE THE INSTABILITY ALOFT. NONE OF THIS ACTIVITY WILL BE VISIBLE NOR CAN ANYONE FEEL IT DUE TO THE FACT THAT S8 STEALTHNADOS ARE EXPECTED TO DEVELOPE CAUSING STEALTH DAMAGE WHICH CANNOT BE SEEN OR DETECTED ON ANY RADAR BUT TRUST US IT'S GOING TO HAPPEN AND EVEN THOUGH YOU CAN'T FEEL THE EXCESSIVE WIND NOR SEE ANYTHNG BUT CLEAR BLUE SKIES TAKE SHELTER TRUST US STEALTH SYSTEMS ARE DEADLY. HERE ARE SOME SIGNS OUR GREAT UPC RESEARCHERS HAVE FOUND.

STEALTH DAMAGE INDICATORS ON HOW TO KNOW YOUV'E JUST BEEN HIT BY A 300,000+MPH STEALTHNADO
1) YOU CAN'T FIND YOUR CAR KEYS
2) UNEXPLAINED DROWSINESS
3) YOUR COMPUTER CRASHES WITH THE STATEMET "ILLEGAL OPERATION"
4) GETTING CHEWED OUT BY THE BOSS OR IF YOU ARE THE BOSS MORE WRITE UPS ON YOUR STAFF THAN USUAL.
5) LENGTHY PERIODS OF CLEAR BLUE SKIES INDICATE STEALTH ACTIVITY ESPECIALLY AFTER A CHASE BUST THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO PRODUCE A HIGH RISK PDS, IT HAPPENED JUST UNDER STEALTH.
6) UNUSUAL RADAR GLITCHES
7) INSOMNIA

FOR THESE REASONS TAKE IMMEDIATE SHELTER AS THIS EXTREME EVENT APPROACHES THE MIDDLE EAST.
 
You know David, that's probably better than what we had here in Illinois all warm season this year! You didn't miss anything, at least here in Illinois. I would love to hear a little thunder right now.

Stay safe, and merry Christmas!
 
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